It's Crazy Awesome

To be able to wake up for the last 267 days as Mrs Jackman has been surreal. When I did the calculation on timeanddate.com it shocked me to see that we have spent so many days together since our wedding day. Time is flying!!!!

You will not see KJ or DJ this post, as I am flying solo on this entry. I wanted to share some of my private thoughts with you all about how crazy awesome my husband is. Rarely do we find women who have good experiences with men and when they do, and decide to share their experiences, there is always the presence of God and the devil in the reaction to their journey with a good man.

Some women who see it feel jealous, sad, heartbroken... because they are yet to experience the love of a good man. Others plot secretly to take down that good man to prove to the woman that all men are dogs, and she is living in fantasy land. Admittedly I know this because I have been both women at different times in my life.

Unlike my husband, who was raised by two very strong and independent individuals, I was raised by three very stubborn women. The matriarch of the family, my grandmother, has shared candidly her thoughts about men over my childhood right into adulthood. They were only to be seen as a bank, in my simple mind's eye. Her daughters, my mom and aunt, were polar opposites and with a foundation like this with no committed male figures around was a recipe for the storm called Diosa!

Back it up a bit, let me deal with the gold egret in the room. If you knew me from 1983 until 2000, my name is Dionne. If you met me after 2000, my name is Diosa. My mother gave me the name Dionne after the famous singer Dionne Warwick, you know her, the psychic network friends Dionne Warwick? No...still do not know her? What about the aunt of the late Whitney Houston? Ahhh...yes, her. My mother loved her music, and at the tender age of 16 decided she would call her first born daughter Dionne.

I grew up and the name Dionne was not at all to my liking. After my mother died in 1999, many other life experiences lead me to Cuba, where I found the hell Cubans had with even pronouncing the name Dionne. There are no double n's in Spanish so they botched it up nice enough for me to reinvent myself and thus Diosa was born. I cut my hair, dyed it pink and boy did I break free of a past that was filled with the deep roots of abandonment.

Fast forward to my wedding day. Kavan, this man knew my past, he knew the vision I had for myself and my son, he knew the storms I have had to weather with no one but God on my side. Yet he stood by me. Yet he waited for me patiently. We both had a deep discussion that would run any man from near a woman, the idea to do it God's way. To wait until our wedding night to give ourselves to each other fully. In 2017 men still wait and respect a woman's body? Its's Crazy Awesome, but YES!!!

He waited for me...

If you are still stuck on the construct of my name change, don't waste your time, as when I die that will not even matter, as I am still promised a new name when I meet my heavenly Father, if you are a believer then you will know we all will be given new names, our REAL names. What we decide to call our children here is only a reflection of what is to come, so don't be too hung up on that.

Instead, get what I am really sharing...the love of a man will be known by his willingness to wait. A man who waits is a man who is willing to put in the work a marriage needs for it to grow. Good times and bad times will come, but a man who is patient will weather both storms with you. A patient man is a strong man, who will not be easily swayed by the peer pressure of his male buddies to ditch the woman and go to the club for more women and drinks. A patient man is willing to sacrifice himself so you will be safe, and that is security every woman should feel.

Will his patience run out? Of course!

After all I am one Crazy Awesome woman with a very colourful history and a super bright future ahead of me. Will he leave me? Yes he will...the man has to go to work doesn't he? Made you laugh...

Thanks for reading and do seek to be patient with your men.